Housewife (Poetry)

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Look at my closet

see the trinkets?

the things

my rings, the bling

and my appetite

for shoes

for thrills

for men who trawl

the intersections at 4

at dawn,

or when the moon

wets the skin

between my thighs

 

Look at my husband

a man

an object

thrice desired

emulated by the soldier

worshipped by the throng

by the God-man

who weeps for his soul

 

And look at me

the housewife

Plain Jane with an apron

and a miscarriage

on the way

–words by Teegee Villanueva

Finding Nemo

fish, fishes in an aquarium, manila ocean park, pictures of fishes

fish, fishes in an aquarium, manila ocean park, pictures of fishes

“I’ve crossed some kind of invisible line. I feel as if I’ve come to a place I never thought I’d have to come to. And I don’t know how I got here. It’s a strange place. It’s a place where a little harmless dreaming and then some sleepy, early-morning talk has led me into considerations of death and annihilation.”
― Raymond Carver, Where I’m Calling From: New and Selected Stories

Follow me on Instagram: @teegeev

 

Give Me Shelter

poor man, homeless man, homeless people, depression, sadness

“Give Me Shelter”. Carriedo, Manila. May 18, 2016. Photography by Teegee Villanueva

I was overcome with a deep and profound sadness this afternoon. I felt dead; I came undone and it obviously affected my output. I was editing images when the thoughts came on, and I was ruminating non-stop. I went silent for two hours. I ignored everyone who tried to speak to me. And after an hour or two, I felt better; relieved, at the moment, from the demons who perpetually torment me.

I tell you this with absolutely certainty: this illness will kill me one day. I don’t know when…maybe tomorrow, maybe in the next two years. Who can say.

On the photo: while walking around Binondo, I ran into a man washing his clothes (and himself) at the Carriedo fountain. It was dirty and the water was polluted. He noticed me, and when he did he carried on as if I weren’t even there. It was a sad sight and I thought it was reflective of the Filipino experience–at least for those living in the margins. It’s not an easy life for most Filipinos; most people live on subsistence wages or very low salaries here, and life becomes a burden…when it shouldn’t even be.

 

Give Me Happiness

happiness, binondo, binondo manila

 

“Give Me Happiness”. Escolta Street, Manila. May 18, 2016. Photography by Teegee Villanueva

“There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.”

–Anthony De Mello

Follow me on Instagrem: @teegeev