For Peter, My Ghost (Poetry)

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Peter old friend

we are only human

we are made of dust

from Adam’s soil: ashes

creatures of chance

unable to cope

unable to see

blind to the world

and the bridges put forth before us,

we are damned

to suffer, one way or another

to rest everlasting, to end.

But we are glorious

even when we come undone

and the world will always remember

the songs we wrote

for Alice, for Emma

for women we do not even know

–Words by Teegee Villanueva

Spurn (Poetry)

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Are you really worth the trouble

The wait

The glory and the devotion?

Are you a religion

A god, my God?

My savior and redeemer?

 

Like a seed

Implanted in rich soil

You sprout out tendrils

That reach out;

they come at me

With knives,

they hold me hostage

 

You play with my emotions

And what a cruel thing to do—

Who the fuck do you think you are?

 

Words, photography by Teegee Villanueva

Tongues (Poetry)

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This poem is about you
your big nose
your perfect teeth
your heavy eyes
your humble lips

I miss you.
On quiet nights
when your legs
were wrapped around mine
when our tongues
spoke a language,
only lovers could mime

What happened to us?
to you, my solitude?
solace of every passing summer
the peace of every dreary winter
are you there?
do you still care?

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Words and photography by Teegee Villanueva

The Poverty

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  1. There is so much poverty in my city. It’s like walking into a bin. People who are starving and homeless litter the corridors, the alleyways, the secret passages…they exist in their secret worlds, sequestered forever, cursed ad infirm by a cycle that never ends.
  2. I’m going to make it my mission to raise awareness and to ensure the redress of their grievances…through art and photography. I don’t know how yet; how precisely to communicate this message in an artistic language, but I’ll get there.

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Continue reading “The Poverty”

Sweet Love (Poetry)

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I have a feeling in my gut

stomach in funky knots

words I want to vomit but I won’t.

I would rather listen.

 

Hardly a woman I make

I’m hardly a man at all

but I know when I am being tested

I know when I am being duped

I can tell when your sentences are warped

into fractured phrases,

when your lie becomes God’s honest truth

 

Sweet love, are you cheating on me?

 

Words and photography by Teegee Villanueva. Photographed at Bacolod City, 2016.

Voices (Poetry)

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Do you hear me?

Crying alone in the wilderness

For my mother

For my mother’s mother

For her sister, her brother

Myself

My soul

 

Are you there?

Do you hear it? My voice

Can you hear it?

Lurching in the dark

Crowing and yearning

For nothing;

For it never meant anything

To anyone

But me

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Poetry by Teegee Villanueva; Photography by Teegee Villanueva. Photographed at Bacolod City, Philippines.

 

Nicotine Lips (Poetry)

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Black tar

Nicotine lips

Lips as fine as sand.

I long to kiss

Lips like mine

I long to feel

With my thumb, with my thumb

With my own bare hands, the history;

Or just a pair of lips to rub against

Whenever the moon turns blue

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Poetry and Photography by Teegee Villanueva. Photographed at Bacolod City, July 2016

 

Facebook Detox: Day 1 of 100

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“Do it if you wanna do it,” said B “but why put yourself through that though, that’s like self-denial on a totally Christian level, and you hardly ever go to Mass”
I chug my beer, still cold, “I kinda wanna live in the moment, stay in the moment while it lasts”

And then I was off Facebook. The updates stopped, the endless stream of pictures, the gossip, they all stopped. For a moment I felt at peace. I had only myself to look up to, myself to please, and my friends did not agree at all with my “coming to terms” sort of, my growing “self-awareness”. Whatever. They thought it was passe–that I was part of this “growing” movement of people who wanted to boycott Facebook because it was fashionable.
No…I love Facebook, but I just want to focus on what’s important: me. My happiness, something I neglect a lot only because I work thrice as hard, and put in more effort than most people I know.

It’s time to slow things a bit.

***

Frustrations

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  1. I’ll be in Bacolod to take pictures all weekend. It’s a trip I’m looking forward to; a totally new environment, a different culture, people, language. Dumaguete is my home and will be my home for quite some time but I tire of the place occasionally and long for some kind of escape; a release from its grip per se.
  2. I take photos of urban life, the squalor, people in the margins, the Filipino (or the foreigner) going about the tedium of daily life…Ultimately, I want my photographs to drive people to act, to inspire people to help. I don’t want to glamorize poverty, it’s a problem. And I go out of my way to show people that life in the Philippines isn’t that peachy for most. So are my followers on Instagram missing the point? I know people in the “first world” have the resources, the time, and much more, so what’s stopping you? This isn’t even about art anymore; there’s a place and time for that. And there is nothing “fabulous” about a group of children scurrying for food.
  3. And yeap, I write poetry too.

Follow me on Instagram: @teegeev

Photography by Teegee Villanueva

Fluid (Poetry)

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Fluid as a boy
Fluid as a girl
Our bodies mix, entangled
Underneath the yellow sheet
(do you like me like this, naked?)
Staring at your blue-green eyes
I uncover the secrets of the Universe
Yours.
And Mine.
And for a moment, it felt,
As though my entire existence
Were reduced to a single point:
This.

 

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Words and photography by Teegee Villanueva